Enjoy the looming zombie apocalypse!

Thursday is supposed to be work-from-home day, which is effectively sleep-two-hours-later day, but this week I am staying with furies and her Internet has been unreliable. So today I turn to my boss like, "Oh, hey, I'm staying with a friend this week and she doesn't have Internet," thinking he will tell me to just take the day off, which, why did I think that? He is a crazy slave-driving taskmaster. So he's like, "Just come in and work from my apartment." And then he noticed the look of abject horror on my face and I had to explain how much I wanted to sleep late, and he laughed at my misery because that is the kind of horrible jerk he is. Except not really. Yesterday, he was in the studio and bombarding us with emails, and like 28 emails later he goes, "AM I SENDING ENOUGH EMAILS? CAN YOU TELL I GOT MY LAPTOP BACK?" So I, being a snot, reply-all with, "I don't know about anyone else, but I'd like to receive five or six more emails from you today." And then I get more messages.

Entitled "one," "two," "three," "four," and "five."

So I emailed him back with, "I hate you and I quit."

Also, today nobody gave up a seat for me on the subway, because apparently I do not look pregnant enough in this sweater, so I had to stand all the way from 181st to Prince, and I had to climb roughly ninety-seven different sets of stairs.

So, in conclusion, I am really really tired, and I have had it up to here with this fucking groaning in the streets. I NEED TO SLEEP, RECENTLY DECEASED PEOPLE!